


The New Rules

by Haywire



Category: Zombieland (2009)
Genre: F/M, First Time, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-26
Updated: 2013-12-26
Packaged: 2018-01-06 04:43:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1102547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Haywire/pseuds/Haywire
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Columbus and Wichita finally get some alone time when Tallahassee takes Little Rock out for a few hours. Columbus is more than ready for their first time, or is he?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The New Rules

**Author's Note:**

  * For [whisperingblue](https://archiveofourown.org/users/whisperingblue/gifts).



> Warnings for sexual content, though nothing too graphic really.
> 
> Written as a treat for whisperingblue for Yuletide 2013, hope that you enjoy it! :)

Given that there was no electricity nearly anywhere these days, the fact that the bedroom was lit only by candlelight should have been no surprise. It was done with a purpose that evening, however, and with fewer candles than might have otherwise been used.

As far as Columbus could figure, it was either Valentine’s Day or the day before Valentine’s Day, he wasn’t exactly sure - his cell phone had been his go to reference for all things calendar-wise but those days were long gone - and he’d arranged the master bedroom of the house they were currently settled into for the occasion.

The house, an old Victorian style two story model, was structurally sound and easily defensible, nestled inside a small and mostly cleared out town that had had a small population before the apocalypse anyway, so it was the perfect spot to set up camp for a time. They’d been there for about two weeks now and, if their food reserves held out, Tennessee reckoned they could stay there for the rest of the winter and move on in the spring. The others were keen to stop traveling for awhile and readily agreed with his assessment.

There were three bedrooms, all of them upstairs, with the master being the largest. It took a lot of cajoling and bribing to convince Tallahassee to allow Columbus and Wichita to share it rather than him having it to himself. He only relented after Wichita and Little Rock found a mostly full box of Twinkies in the local corner store and gifted them to him, which gesture temporarily weakened his disposition. They pounced on his weakness and he begrudgingly ceded the room to them, moving to the second largest room down the hall, while Little Rock was more than happy to set up in the third and final room.

The stairs leading to the second level were damaged and a wide gap existed, keeping anyone from easily walking upstairs unless they moved one of the nearby doors Tallahassee had removed from their hinges as a plank, one on either side. The four of them kept the doors off to the side while not in use, as an impromptu moat of sorts, to keep any unwanted shamblers from getting to them and thus creating an additional layer of safety.

To afford Columbus and Wichita some privacy that night, Tallahassee had taken Little Rock out to scavenge more supplies. There was a small supermarket in a mini mall about twenty minutes away that they’d previously cleared and which would be safe enough for them both to be, plus if anything did come after them Tallahassee was more than capable of handling it. More supplies didn’t hurt, either, so they were killing two birds with one stone.

At that same mini mall there were also a few clothing stores, and while they’d been picked pretty clean all four of them had found new clothes for themselves, including what Wichita was wearing that evening. Laying on the master bed, she was wearing a black negligee that was one size too small for her, but which Columbus did not mind at all. He stood there and grinned goofily at her, losing his train of thought for a second.

“Come to bed already, would you?” she called out playfully, patting the spot next to her. “I’m getting cold.” The sheets of the bed were pulled down for now and her feet were stuck under them, and she wiggled her toes for emphasis.

Shaking his head, Columbus blinked and started moving once again. “Right, right. Sorry, I just…” His eyes took her in again, gorgeous in the candlelight. Even her shadow, which twitched and shifted along with the flickering light source, was bewitching to behold. He still couldn’t believe that she was interested in him, and - and he was drifting off again, whoops. “...right.”

Wichita laughed her easy laugh as she watched him disrobe, leaving his t-shirt on as he kicked off his shoes and shimmied out of his jeans down to just his boxers. She frowned as he marched to the bed, looking down at his feet. “Are you gonna wear your socks, too, or…?”

“Oh, crap.” He sat on the edge of the bed and peeled them off, tossing them back onto his pile of clothes and turning back to her. Columbus then started to move further up the bed before stopping a second time, raising a finger to her. “Almost forgot.”

He hopped off the bed and reached for his jeans, fishing in his pockets and coming out with a foil wrapped package. Even with them being some of the last people on earth and the question of repopulating the human species begging to be addressed, there were some things that neither of them were just ready to get into yet. Columbus had found a few boxes of condoms a few towns earlier and had wisely pocketed them, hoping for a future occasion such as that moment where they might come in handy. Holding the condom up, he wiggled it and made his way back to the bed.

“Ah, right, good call. I don’t know where you’ve been, after all.” Wichita said with a straight face. She shifted, laying on her side with one hand propping her head up and the other resting along her leg.

“Lucky for you, I am a blank slate, actually. I- um.” Columbus lay down next to her, putting his own feet under the covers as he searched for words but finding none.

She laughed, reaching down with her hand to pull the sheets up over them both. “Relax, cowboy, I was just teasing you. Mostly.” Wichita added with a wink. She moved closer to him, sliding across the sheets until they were face to face, and placed her hand on his shoulder. “Hi.”

“Hi.” He grinned at her, moving his own hand up to the side of her face.

Rule One: Tuck back her hair behind her ear. Unable to stop himself, Columbus began compiling a new list on the fly, his list of rules to survive a potential sexual encounter. It wasn’t something he’d planned but he knew how his mind worked and Columbus knew better than to fight it, so he went with it.

His fingers stroked Wichita’s soft hair a few times before gently lifting it and pushing it back behind her ear. Columbus ever so softly brushed his fingertips against her earlobe and her neck as he did so, keeping his eyes locked on her the whole time. Which led him to:

Rule Two: Eye contact is important. I think. He watched as Wichita bit her lip and then moved in, closing her eyes as her lips sought out his. Columbus kissed her back, closing his eyes and amending Rule Two to include a Rule Two Point One: Except While Kissing.

Kissing was actually something he’d gotten good at, or so he thought. It was about all that he and Wichita had been able to do since the park, what with Tallahassee and, more importantly, Little Rock around virtually all the time. There’d been some minor groping on both of their parts - more on Wichita’s part than his, to his pleasant surprise - but mainly kissing, and his girlfriend had taught him an awful lot.

While kissing, he moved his other hand to Wichita’s waist, where his fingers felt the warmth of her flesh even through the wispy material of her garment. She shifted her position, laying on her back and allowing Columbus to roll on top of her, which he gladly did. Now with both hands free he slid the other hand further down, down past the end of the negligee and along the outside of her thigh, eliciting a moan from Wichita.

Moving beneath him, she bent her legs, bringing her knees up and causing Columbus’s hand to slide further down her leg. She kissed him harder at that, which gave him an idea.

Rule Three: Tease. While it required a bit of multitasking at things that were fairly alien to him, Columbus moved one hand upward to squeeze Wichita’s breast over the negligee, and, at the same time, slid the hand on her leg inward between her legs, slowly, carefully. When she pressed back against his hand, lifting her midsection to increase the pressure of his fingers, he withdrew just as much, causing her to groan in frustration.

Wichita pulled away from his kiss, panting ever so slightly. “Yes, just like that…” She arched her head up and kissed his neck, which caused him to gasp. It wasn’t anything she’d ever done before, not that he didn’t like it because he did, but it took him by surprise. So when she thrust her lower body up, instead of teasing and moving away he pushed back, directly over her panties. She squealed in delight, putting her own hand over his and keeping it there, guiding him.

Which lead him to Rule Four: Follow Her Lead. Columbus wasn’t exactly sure what he was doing, after all, and who better to show him how to please her than Wichita herself? Her moaning was insistent now and she took his fingers, moving them with hers underneath the side of her underwear and directly onto her bare flesh.

“Wichita…” he whispered, looking down and locking eyes with her again as per Rule Two. “I- I’m ready, I-” Columbus licked his lips, not sure of how to bring it up, but she had, in fact, brought _him_ up. No, he couldn’t say it that way because that was cheesy, but he had to say _something_. “For the condom, I mean.”

She simply nodded, kissing him hard once more and moving back to give him space. “Ok, I’m ready too.” As she pulled back, she swung her legs out to one side to slide her remove her underwear as he moved his legs to the other, doing the same. “Do you need a hand with the condom?”

“Um. I.” Columbus had forgotten all about that, and seeing as he’d never actually used one before he just nodded.

Smirking, Wichita picked up the wrapper and carefully tore it open, removing its contents into the palm of one hand. She sat up and sat next to Columbus, who had removed his last article of clothing and who was clearly just as ready as he’d indicated.

“Oh wow, you weren’t kidding, heh.” She leaned in and kissed him, softly this time, while adjusting the condom and placing it on Columbus.

“Mmmph, ngggghhh, mrh-!” Columbus pressed his lips hard against her suddenly as her hands, sliding the condom on and adjusting it properly, did far more than Wichita had intended to accomplish and set him off. He saw stars and an intense rush flooded through him, starting at his genitals and quickly spreading throughout the rest of his body. “Gaaaah… I…” Columbus didn’t want it to end like that but it was impossible to regain control.

Wichita realized what was going on nearly as soon as it had began and instead of fighting it committed to intensifying her boyfriend’s orgasm, using her hand to greater effect since there was no turning back at that point. “Shh, it’s ok, don’t worry.” Wichita said, slowing down and stopping her actions once Columbus’s body stopped tensing up and relaxed, sagging back down onto the bed.

Flopping onto his back, Columbus closed his eyes and sighed. Rule Five: Stamina, Stamina, Stamina. Which… yeah. He didn’t know how to work on that, exactly, but felt a sudden and pressing need to do so. He had hoped all the cardio he’d done would’ve helped but apparently not as much as he’d liked.

“I’m sorry, Wichita.” he managed after he was able to breathe regularly again.

“It’s ok, I promise.” She lay down next to him, kissing him on the shoulder as she gently removed her hand from his groin. “That was intense, you really went off there, lover.” Wichita reached up with her other hand and wiped some of the sweat off his brow. “Like, a _lot_. Wow.”

It took all of his effort to roll over and look at her, a small grin on his face. “Yeah, well, you got me pretty excited there, you know. So it’s kind of your fault.” he joked. “And thank you.”

Wichita laughed and leaned in, kissing him softly. “You are more than welcome, but you owe me now, sir.” She cuddled up against him, pulling the sheets back up over them both. “But don’t worry about that right now. This is nice, let’s just enjoy this, ‘k?” Her hand slid over his bare chest, feeling his heart as it still raced wildly.

He pushed his head back against hers, moving his hand up and slipping his fingers in between hers. “I don’t think I could do anything but lay here, actually.” Columbus said. “I don’t think I’d want to either, though.”


End file.
